this is das.

maybe because I am too kind

I wish my friends always have a priority for me too

I thought I never refuse anything they asked

but I noticed I've been refused a lot

now I just got it, never depend your friends too much.

yea I got it

they have their own business

their own way to solve the problems

they have their own thoughts

I know now, it's not easy to get along with them whenever I want to, whenever I need them

we are mature now

we are not the same person we knew since we were kids

so, what's the thing you hate the most in friendship?

not only in friendship thing, I really hate if someone dissapoint me, in any reasons. that someone asked me to do something or make a promise that make me happy for a moment, but then that someone just said 'sorry, not today' or 'sorry I have a thing, maybe later pal'. stuff like that. one or two times, still okay with that. but more than that. I am really tired to hear of thoooose things.

the thing make you happy in friendship? is there any?

so many things of course! I am happy if my friends remember my days, no matter if they only send a message though, I am still happy. a friend who gonna talk anything about his/her feeling for me but say it in a good way. not stabbed at me and stabbed my other friends as well. I am very happy if we can share our 'senseless' dreams together and we dont laugh of it. I am happy if we can spend the day together. see their smiles, laugh for their jokes, scream for their crazy actions. I love when they hug me without saying anything. I'll cry when I hug them and they hug me back even tighter. I am happy we can share our home made food and feeding each other. reading together and quiet without any awkward feeling. I am happy when they call my name when we are still apart. I am happy when I read their message and asking about my condition. I am happy when they told me they remember me when they saw a thing in somewhere.

I've read some tweets from @islamdiaries, they say if I am looking for a best person for being bestest friend, I will never meet her/his. that's right, totally. I am now just have to be more realistic. my friends also have their own life.